I have a small alien thing following me around let me tell u…

I believe I have a familiar and I need to tell everyone about this.

I found myself looking into the vastness of reality, searching for something, anything, who knows what, all I knew was I was looking. On the precipice of finding, I pondered the reality of reality and realized that because I am one I am all but because I am all I can also be one.

This epiphany led to an exploration of my energy. Shiva is my god, I am a Shiva person. I saw his massive wave of energy in front of me. Seeing this I felt one with all. I took this energy in and realized this human existence is NOT going to fit all that. I divided myself into part of Shiva I cut off a sliver and brought it back with me. I brought back a friend.

I am Shiva at my core. I have had many reincarnations and upon these reincarnations, I gained a friend, an energy pulse, a buddy.  Him, She, He, It, Debra, who knows; sometimes shes a polar bear, many times she is my first pet Kacey, no matter the “image” it is the same energy.

I think this energy has been with me for quite a while. The only thing is for about 20 years I have been without it so I need to relearn a thing or two. I think that many kiddos have soul creatures they have invited to join them in this life but many times they start to believe they are not real.

Your imagination is a sense and it is something we all need to work towards improving.


My understanding of my growth

I was born was an anxiety disorder, that’s what the doctors would call it anyway. I’m starting to believe that my anxiety stems from an internal disequilibrium with the crazy world around me and my inner tranquility.

As a child, I would often cry about things that had no likelihood of occurring. Monsters attacking, randomly choking on a fork and suffocating to death, my bedroom was my biggest battle in the long run.

I have vivid memories of monsters lurking in the darkness of my closet, in the drawers filled with toys under my bed waiting for me to put a foot down so they could drag me into the abyss, the light coming toward me in the window was always an alien spaceship coming to abduct me and take me away from my family, that part freaked me out the most. All these things happened in my bedroom so I would sneak into my parent’s bed every night I had the opportunity.

That was cute when I was five but once I got a bit bigger and a little less cute they were done with my shit. From a parenting perspective, I completely understand why they would shove me in my room and lock their door so I couldn’t disrupt their sleep with my restless leg syndrome; from my perspective, I was abandoned. I woke up more than a few times in the hallway in front of my parent’s room after crying myself to sleep from emotional disarray and panic. The things in my room were not going to let me survive the night alone in there I was completely sure of that.

I am unsure when or how I decided it was safe to go in but I can tell you that I wasn’t happy about it. The thing is, this experience, no matter how it happened, was about growth. I am now a full grown adult at 20 years old. Many of my peers are struggling to work out their own issues having not faced any battles on their own.  I am proud to say I’ve been there and done that.

My anxiety taught me at a young age that risk-taking pays off. I faced my fears, got up off the hallway floor and went into my death filled room. That took bravery. Whether or not there was a risk, in reality, it was a risk none the less. My childhood brain was completely sure I would not make it through the night, many people stay scared when they get scared, they don’t have a locked door preventing them from obvious safety. You can escape into your phone, you can get in the car and drive, but until you stand up and face your fears you are not going to grow.

I believe those like me who are able to face their fears young and feel invincible once they are gone hold on to that feeling of invincibility because if I survived the actual monsters that I know were in there, I can jump any obstacle I come in contact with.


I went to a Catholic school from first grade until the eighth grade and life kind of sucked. I didn’t get spanked or anything interesting like that, but I did learn all about Catholicism, and after careful consideration, I have figured out that it is not for me. I do not believe God has rules, I believe when you are truly good you know to be good because why would you be anything else?? projecting positivity brings you more positivity who wouldn’t want that??

When looking at religion from an outside perspective it’s interesting to note most of them have a beginning with a person. Joseph Smith for example “lead the Mormons to salt lake city” he started a religion because he found some gold plates and god told him that only he could see the gold plates so he cannot show anyone these gold plates and THERE ARE SO MANY MORMONS.

My point is there is only one man who said this thing about Jesus and people believed him with little to no proof, so much that he formed an immensely popular new religion.

Anyway, this post is labeled Hinduism because unlike most other religions, Hinduism is the only frequently practiced religion with an unknown originator. Not to say the texts associated were not somehow propagated by a person but to say, wow that shit has really been around for a long time and the ideas behind it seem actually valid.

Take the Ashtavakra Gita for example, it is a “Gita” or song where a Hindu god talks to us and explains that the Universe just Is and that is that. My favorite part: “All that is not can never be and all that is may never cease.” As in everything is just here and the material world is a phenomenon with bursts of life every here and there.

This existence is purely due to the evolution of human beings, so as to allow the cosmic awareness to manifest itself individually in each of us.


My card of the day today was the three of swords reversed as in its a day for moving forward, forgiving, and letting go. This has been the theme of the week it seems. However, it is actually probably the theme of 2018.

We all can agree 2018 was not a great year, with natural disasters, poorly made government decisions, and cosmic alignments up the whaazo humans, at least the ones around me are OVER IT.

I believe 2018 should be left in the past. We all should take the events of today and allow them to live in their place and time, allowing is the first step to forgiving, moving, changing, GROWING. In order to grow, one must allow growth. To get hurt then continue hurting because of that time in the past you got hurt is absurd. Once you have learned from your pain you should be free to go do not allow your pain to hold you in place.

I’m all for getting broken up with and spending a weekend in bed but when the weekend is over its time to get up and MOVE ON.  Re-download tinder and fuck some shit up because that three-month relationship does not need to be dwelled on, only learned from then DROPPED.

FORGIVENESS IS A SELF-CARE ACT NOT A SIGN OF WEAKNESS. Love yourself and let other people fuck up their own lives!


The Beginning

So this is where it begins. I am Universal. The only way to become what I am is to believe that I am. The Universe has been pushing me to start blogging and here I am after watching a TED talk about procrastination by Tim Urban, I realized that I was procrastinating what I’ve been sent out to do.

I firmly believe I have been called here to guide our human conscience life into the age of Aquarius. We all have the power to feel our power and use it. Females most dominantly, this is why our society has for so long decided to repress the female form. As females raise into self-love we raise into self-power. Feminity is the power of compassion, the intellect of understanding emotion.

As for my philosophy, I believe what we see is a product of our own reality if you believe you are a teacher you become a teacher, the motivation of actualizing your full potential, knowing the possibility to change the world is in your fingertips, pushes you to fulfill the predetermined path you are happy to take.

The thing about human life is that its hard. A difficult set of tasks is before us in the FAKE society we have set up for ourselves. We need to balance our concepts of society and fitting in with our group-oriented living patterns by our needs to fulfill our emotional reasoning to be here. Some people get overwhelmed with their own abilities or possibilities and spiral into a decent of youtube videos and weed.

I’ve been a victim of Youtubevideosandweeditis I know I have things to offer to the earth on a global scale and I need to share these thoughts before it is too late. At 20 years old I am beginning my fight to raise the vibrations of human life. The fifth dimension is upon us have you discovered your eternal self yet?